Calling All Homeschoolers!

Shortly before Eli was born I began to contemplate homeschooling in the future. In those days I blogged on Xanga and asked for opinions from home school students and parents. Now I am asking you! I go back and forth on this issue a lot, so I would love to hear from people who have "been there, done that."

What are some of the pros and cons of homeschooling, in your opinion? What influenced your decision to educate your children at home? What methods and materials do you use? How do you make sure that your children get proper socialization outside of the home? If you were homeschooled, what did you like about it? What did you dislike?

Thank you in advance for your input!

Blessings and Provisions

Wow.

That describes how I have felt over the past couple of weeks as I have seen God provide for us in so many different ways. He knows our needs and the desires of our hearts, and He cares about us so much that He provides at the times when they will have the greatest impact.

Forgive me for the lengthiness of this post, but some background is required to understand the way these things touched my heart. I plan to do some more well thought out writing in the near future, but I had just had to share these praises with you!

First of all, our financial situation has been tight for the past couple of months. In anticipation of losing our military insurance due my husband getting out of the National Guard, we signed up for insurance through his employer. Can I just say that switching to regular insurance after having military coverage for several years is a little rough? The monthly price tag and the deductible make me a little ill. I won't go into a discussion about insurance though *wink*. In February, we received our final paycheck for Rob's Guard drills. So, we lost income and gained expense. We had begun to prepare for this months ago by cutting out budget before we truly needed to do so, but it was still a hard pill to swallow and things have been tight. I am an awful worrier, and I began to stress out about the situation. I even started looked at the classifieds because I was convinced that I would need to get a job. Thank God that He has better plans than I! On Wednesday I received two checks in the mail for reimbursements from things that happened months ago. That same day we learned that Rob qualified for the highest level of bonus and pay raise. The former took some weight off of my shoulders for expenses this month. The latter reminded me that being able to leave my job a year ago in order to stay home with my son was no accident.

In relation to the insurance switch and our son, we were also able to find Eli a new doctor who seems to share many our ideas and philosophies. That was a huge relief because the process of finding a new pediatrician was getting depressing and stressful!

God has also answered a long time prayer of mine recently. Ever since I chose to stay home, I have struggled with loneliness. I was the first among my closest group of friends to have a baby. Being out of school and out of the working world, I found that friendships did not come as easily as they had before. I joined the local MOPS group in September, but I felt awkward and like I was struggling to fit in with the group. Then in just the past couple of months it was like something finally clicked. I began to feel really comfortable with the women at my table and found that I had a lot in common with many of them. I even stepped out of that new found comfort zone of my table and met other women in the group. Through various circumstances over the past couple of months I feel that God has opened doors for potential friendships and for that I am incredibly thankful.

Finally...and this one is weird...I feel that God is confirming my desire for a more natural, healthy lifestyle through His provision. I had basically given up on it when we cut our grocery budget. Recently I found out (via one of the women at my MOPS table!) about a new local source of grass fed beef. And get this- it's $2.00/lb!! I can rarely even find beef at the grocery store for that price! Amazingly healthy food that fits into my itty bitty grocery budget? You'd better believe it! It's super tasty meat too! Not only that, but I am also working with some others on setting up a drop for Azure Standard which would provide even more budget-friendly healthy food. This co-op has great deals on bulk grains, and shortly before I started gauging others for interest in it I was blessed with the opportunity to buy a grain mill from a sweet friend for an excellent price. Now I will be able to take my quest for health even further by grinding (and sprouting? maybe?) my own grains!

I am just so thankful. The financial provision, friends and food themselves don't even matter as much as the knowledge that God does indeed love us and has our best interests at heart. Even if all of those things disappear tomorrow, I will hang on to the hope and grace He has given me so abundantly.

Oh, how He loves us...

Just a Boring Update!

Thanks to everyone who left encouraging comments on my last post! I really appreciate your supportive words and the reassurance that I am not the only one who feels that way.

I am still kind of feeling that way. I know I feel better when I am productive, but sometimes it's so hard to break out of the rut and DO something. It's a vicious cycle. It doesn't help that I am exhausted. I need to get a decent night's sleep.

I did have a really nice weekend. I attend a ladies' retreat with my church. Doing something like that is totally out of my comfort zone, and I roomed with people I didn't really know prior to the retreat. It was a great experience! Friday night I did Zumba for an hour! I am going to look into going to a class in town because it was a blast! The girls in my room stayed up late talking (and eating junk food!), and we were up bright and early Saturday morning for breakfast and workshops. I attended some very informative workshops on raising godly kids and marriage. I also picked up some info on organizing, and I need all the help I can get in that area. By far the workshop that had the greatest impact on me was on treating anxiety and depression naturally. I am definitely planning to incorporate some of the things I learned into my life and do more research on this subject. I'll post more on that later.

Since this weekend was all about stepping out of my comfort zone, I was convinced to do the zip line at the camp where the retreat was held.

Um, yeah, I jumped off of this.

Have I mentioned that I am afraid of heights? It was terrifying at the top, but actually going down the zip line was awesome! I'm not so sure that I will ever do that again though!

I know this post was boring. I wish I had the energy to write something more interesting. Thanks for reading it anyway :)

It's My Blog, and I'll Vent if I Want To!

I've had some form of a blog for almost ten years. I've had an Open Diary, a LiveJournal, and a few Xangas. Even this blog has had a few other forms. The major difference between this blog and my blogs of old is that I am not as open with my every day life here. Maybe it's the .com? Is there something about owning my own domain name that makes me think that I can't be honest about my daily life? Should it deter me from posting about the mundane or sharing some not so organized thoughts once in while?

I think not.

So here we go. This week stinks. I'm tired, bummed out, unmotivated and unproductive. I've eaten a lot of cookies. My child doesn't seem to want to sleep (up for three hours in the middle of the night here, refusal to nap there). I'm frustrated because our life is currently in a state of limbo. I want to make decisions and plans, but I can't right now. The ground is wet and my dog keeps tracking mud into my house.

I want to sleep until Sunday.

But I can't. I need to clip coupons and make a grocery list. There are dishes to wash and laundry to fold. The toilets need to cleaned and the floors need to be scrubbed. Events need to be planned and attended, so I need to put on a smile (and some mascara) and be social. Most of all, my Bible study has been neglected this week and family needs me.

Bring on the coffee....french press, please. With vanilla and hazelnut creamer. And Sun Crystals.

Then Sings My Soul Saturday - Forgiven by Sanctus Real

Today I discovered Then Sings My Soul Saturday via Casey's blog, and I knew I had to participate! Music has been a huge part of my Christian walk. The first time I was convinced that I needed Jesus was almost seven years ago I was in a youth service singing "I Will Overcome" by Charlie Hall. I remember breaking down under the weight of my pain and believing that Jesus could truly make me whole. From that point on, God has spoken to my heart through the gift of music.

Most recently, I have been ministered to by the song "Forgiven" by Sanctus Real. The bridge has been especially encouraging in relation to my recent struggles with self worth.

"When I don't fit in
And I don't feel like I belong anywhere
When I don't measure up to much in this life
Oh, I'm a treasure in the arms of Christ..."



See more Then Sings My Soul entries at Signs, Miracles and Wonders.

Desiring God's Praise and Glorifying Him with Our Lives

One year ago, I wrote a letter of resignation and quit my job so I could stay at home with my son. I had been on maternity leave for ten weeks and could not bear the thought of returning to work. We learned that I would be able to stay home just two weeks before I was supposed to start working again. The past thirteen months have been the most rewarding of my life, and I have never felt regret about deciding not to work. I realize how incredibly blessed I am to be able to be at home.

Lately, however, I have really struggled with the value of what I do. I have battled with the messages that this world feeds us about what equates worth. I have imagined that friends and family look down on me for the choices I have made. I have felt unimportant and unappreciated. Joy has eluded me as I let lies take root in my mind. I have questioned whether or not this will even matter to Eli when he is adult, if it matters at all.

The answer is yes, it does matter. More than I will ever know.

I recently joined a women's Bible study at church. We are going through the Gospel of John. I joined in the middle of the study, but I think the timing was divine. Last week we studied John 12. I read John 12:42-43 about leaders in the Jewish community who believed in Jesus but would not proclaim their belief because of the Pharisees. Verse 43, when read through the lens of my own life, hit me hard. It says, "...for they loved praise from men more than praise from God."

By whom do I desire to be praised?

My frustration is rooted in my own selfish desires to be praised by the world. I have let myself believe that if I am not being exalted by the standards of this world, then I am not doing anything of worth. That thinking is sadly deluded. As the wonderful women in my Bible study reminded me, the work we do as mothers is so much greater than the things of this world. Our work is eternal and it matters to God. His is the only praise we should desire.

As I have read and prayed further about this issue, I have come to realize something else. The only praise I should seek is that of God, but above that I should desire to bring Him glory through my life. I recently began the first non-fiction book from my book list, Don't Waste You Life by John Piper. I am only a few chapters into it, but I have already gleaned much wisdom from Piper's words. The following passages are some that I felt fit in perfectly with the passage from John that spoke to me so deeply:

"God created me - and you - to live with a single, all embracing, all transforming passion - namely a passion to glorify God by enjoying and displaying his supreme excellence in all the spheres of life." (p.31)

"God calls us to pray and think and dream and plan and work not to be made much of, but to make much of him in every part of our lives." (p.37)

My greatest desire should not be to be made much of (and certainly not be the world's standards) but to make much of my Creator in everything I do. My goal should be to glorify Him through my life. My joy is to be found in this single passion.

Mothers, if you find yourself feeling like what you do doesn't matter or that no one appreciates it, please take heart. Believe me when I say that it does matter. Better yet, don't worry about what I or any other person has to say, and believe God when He says how much it matters to Him. Work diligently and joyfully and passionately, desiring with your whole heart to glorify God in all that you do. The rewards are far more spectacular than anything the world could ever offer.

Learning the Art of Couponing

I've never been much of a coupon clipper or deal hunter. Instead, I just stress over constantly going over my grocery budget. Well, that just isn't going to work for me anymore! Thanks to the abundance of money saving blogs out there and testimonials from personal friends, I can no longer deny that couponing WORKS. It might take a little more effort, but if it means that I could save as much as 70% on my grocery bill I will take it!

Here is my plan:

1. Clip, clip, clip! I'm going to clip and file coupons like a mad woman.
2. Every Wednesday I will check the ads for local grocery stores.
3. After I check the ads, I will compare my coupons AND head over to Frugal Fritzie to see the deals she finds. I am SO glad I discovered this blog via The Frugal Map. She covers both of the grocery stores where I plan to shop (trying to give up Wal-Mart as much as possible). If you haven't already, check out The Frugal Map to locate a deal finder in your area.
4. Shop with CASH. We're getting a little bit Dave Ramsey around here, folks. Again, we've seen it work too often to deny it anymore.

So why I am doing this? Because I have dreams for my family. Big dreams. I also have debt that is preventing those dreams from becoming a reality, and if reducing my grocery bill will free up funds to reduce that debt then I am on board.

Tomorrow is my first deal-seeking Wednesday and Friday marks the beginning of a brand new budget. Here I go...wish me luck!